Day 3: Love is not selfish/ Give Attention

The Dare
Buy your spouse something today

I  was going to buy my husband a baked potato today. But he is fasting so I didn't get to buy him anything. Buy buying him something is not an issue for me really. I've always found it easy to spend money on him.Outside of things...I just won't do. I mean well, he asked me to take a ride with him to work, drive him to work and I would pick him up (leaving the house at 5:30 am to get him) I said okay.

On my ride there--he reveals to me that he will not fix our 2nd car because he doesn't trust me. I'm his slave. He acts like my father. I dont sleep with my father so I find him unattractive. Its such a long story but my aim is not to win hearts by his actions. My aim is to worry about what I need to do to do the will of my father. So the details don't matter. All I know is that after hearing that. I have not been able to attend to him.

ATTENTION

Most of our struggles in being attentive to our spouse lie in the root causes of selfishness or laziness. And the process of dealing with this problem requires an active, intentional shift toward thoughtfulness and understanding—putting your wife or husband's needs first, relinquishing the right to do or say whatever you want so you can accommodate what your spouse needs to say or wants to do. This requires intentionally choosing to pause what you are doing and listening with both your eyes and your ears.
Some of the things you'll be "dared" to do in the book will involve even simple gestures that visibly communicate to your spouse, "I was thinking of you," or "Your opinion matters to me." You'll be asked to plan ahead, to do some homework, to make an effort that involves an outlay of time and thought. You must grow the habit of focusing on your mate's needs until it becomes a more natural way of life.
Some helpful verses for you to look up and pay "attention" to:

Philippians 2:4 – be concerned not only about yourself, "but also for the interests of others."

James 1:19–20 – challenge yourself to be "quick to hear, slow to speak"

Proverbs 24:3–4 – recognize that a house is "established by understanding"

Ephesians 5:33 – a man's duty to love his wife "as himself," and his wife to "respect" him